North Korea

I knew Kim Jong Il was nuts, but this is one interesting documentary. Fascinating, depressing and unsettling.

Tea Party Jesus

Putting the words of select brilliant conservatives in the mouth of Jesus. Because it's funny, that's why.


- Sen John Cornyn

- Rush Limbaugh

-GOP Candidate Glen Urquhart

-Sen Rick Santorum

Living in the Fast Lane

Literally. My apartment would likely be where the fast lane of the North Beach freeway would have been if the starry-eyed, crack-smoking developers had their way post-WWII. Yes, that's an 8-lane tunnel right through the poop chute of Russian Hill.

The danger and grace of training for a half-marathon

I like to think I jog at a pretty good clip - enough to slow down when I come to a blind corner on the sidewalk and avoid barreling over some poor old Chinese woman. I usually don't, however, run at about 20 mph with several tons of steal hanging around me on suspenders like a clown outfit. If I did, I'd probably take it a little easy rolling down blind alleyways, too. To each his own, I guess.
As I jogged up to the end of such a blind alleyway today, several tons of metal came rolling out at about 20 mph. What happened next, I'll always regret was not filmed. As the sound of rubber screeching on pavement shot down the alley, I subconsciously did a hand-plant-on-hood to ass-slide-across-hood combo and nailed the dismount about a foot in front of the license plate. It felt so fluid and choreographed, except for the mangled alternate universe me that was laid out in the street. I realized the usual reaction to something like this might be to yell at the driver or panic about what could have been. Somewhere between seeing the driver's horror through the windshield, though, and being incredibly impressed with myself, I jogged on. I should get a special medal or something on my race bib.

Get high now

Fun time-wasting site. My favorite is the Vomit Vectors - I actually felt queasy:

"What taxes? Just pay me! ;)" - Sincerely, our elected officials

Sonuva

But are you super DUPER sorry?!

Another smug, bulletproof CEO, another "grilling" from a panel of turkey-jowled, ill-dictioned politicians. Boy were they angry. They had just had it up to here (their jowls practically resting on it) and were not about to let this gilded meanie and his bully British accent get away without really dressing him down.

The mood was as palpably tense as one would expect for a grilling. Or maybe it was a flogging. Politico said it was a flogging. Though CNN referred to it as a "blasting". I would've expected more excitement for a blasting - maybe a soundtrack for the proceedings and costumes for the pitchfork-carrying panel. I'll stick with the turkey theme and call it a grilling.

These guys were pissed, and they brought their printed grilling questions and stapled them together on standardized office stationary to prove it.

One of them whetted his finger to lift the cover page - here we go! Get ready to be flog-blasted on the grill for all of your untold damages, CEO!

"When you became CEO you said you would have a laser target on safety," his jowl jiggling righteously in the still panel air. "Were you... you were... did you know about this... problem?"

"There was a team that oversaw this drilling and we will be making continued changes with any findings that we conclude," came the equally-scripted answer.

"You.." (fumbling of office stationary, rehearsed line of questioning shattered). "you don't seem like you're regretful of this. Are you?"

"I am truly, deeply regretful of this, of course."

"Are you really, though? It sure doesn't seem that way."

"Absolutely I am."

A wry, skeptical smirk on the panelist's face. Mission accomplished. He would be questioned about his regret's sincerity by several more panelists, as well as additional "laser" references and vague attempts at sounding like they know a single thing about the technical aspects of what they're talking about. Maybe next time don't mess with America, bitch.

Authorities issue warning for major earthquake in September

Full marathons are for wimps. Halves are where it's at.

I feel like I'm probably still grossly underestimating the challenge of running 13.1 miles through hills and over a gusty, golden landmark, but here goes. If you can, please visit my personal race page and consider a small donation to the American Cancer Society. Thanks!